church's Christmas parade float.
Would you believe Wal-Mart doesn't sell red paint!?!
You can get varying shades of red, specifically pink, but you can't get "barn red". You can't even have it mixed! Only shades of red were available, but nothing that anybody would call "red".
Oh, you can get red spray paint and if you go to the craft aisle you can get a little bitty teeny tiny bottle of red paint, but it would take three dozen (at $2.99/bottle) to get it done.
What's the world coming to?
Ace Hardware, here I come!